Welcome to Kimmitroy.blogspot.com

This is your FACE!

2010-01-31T14:55:00.001-06:00

I have almost 500 friends on FB. I'm not bragging. Some I know pretty well. Others I have only met for a day but somehow they made an impression on me. It's kind of weird to think about knowing 500 people in some way or another. It's also kind of amusing that I call them all my “friends” when so many of them were so much more to me. I look at my list and it's almost like an episode of “This is Your Life.” Good, Bad, and Ugly.

I hear all of the time about people reuniting with loved ones they lost contact with. I even know someone who found a long lost brother living in another country.

Facebook is generally a safe place. And I don't mean safe from pedophiles. Safe as in “we can chat even if we weren't best buds” minus the awkward “should we hug or not” moment. Safe to ask for advice from people who you may not have even known they could help. When I needed advice regarding my son in kindergarten, about 8 people commented that either they were Kindergarten teachers themselves or knew someone they could put me in touch with. I got some amazing advice from a college classmate that I probably never would have been in contact with if were not for Facebook.

It's convenient in that there is less guilt involved about not getting in touch with friends who really do mean a lot to you but playing phone tag gets old. And of course, let's not forget the reason I think most people join Facebook. We are nosy by nature. We always want to know. I look at pictures of friends, their friends, their families, and homes to get decorating ideas. You can bet that with every picture I put up on my profile, the background is carefully prepared so that there is nothing distracting tacky or distracting in the background. Surely, that's not just me. Right? We peer into the lives of others and are willing to share our own, rather what we want you to see. I can't get past this idea of image I want to project. I show the really cute pictures of my children, but would I ever take a picture of them in full meltdown mode? How about of me in full meltdown mode? Don't think so.

But, looking at my friend list is pretty intriguing. It's very truthful. Some of the names remind me of those moments caught on my life camera with dozens of witnesses in the fold.

Former teachers and former students. We meet in the middle here.

Then there are the people I wish knew me now rather than decades ago. People that I wonder why they added me. Either they did something shameful to me or I did something shameful to them. It's amazing how 20 years can go by and when we run into someone from a particular past, suddenly we are that kid again that we tried to so hard to get away from. The virtual class reunion. How much did he gain? How much did she lose? Is he on here? Is she talking to me yet? I can't believe she friended me. I was not nice to her. I can't believe she friended me. She was awful to me. Should I ask her to be my friend or will she think I'm stalking her?
I have a girlfriend who denied a friend request from an old classmate because she made out with an old flame. After about 15 years, she still called her a home wrecker. I didn't really laugh because clearly my friend was in the FB time travel tunnel and laughing wasn't going to bring her out. I remember being on the phone with another girlfriend looking for an old college friend. And I confidently said he was my “friend.” We searched and searched and he was nowhere to be found. He de-friended me! I was devastated! What did I say? Did I make an inappropriate comment on his page? For the rest of the conversation I wondered what could I have possibly done to make him de-friend me. Then we laughed at the absurdity of being offended.

I think we can only surmise that our FB friends think of us on the fond side of the time line. Maybe someday, that one friend we have yet to confirm will come around in spite of whatever transgression occurred in the past. Perhaps nosiness can lead to forgiveness.

Screen Scene

2010-01-16T14:54:00.003-06:00

You do not have to have a hard time convincing me to look into the latest tech gadget. I'm certainly not frivolous. I mean I research it well and truly weigh my options if the latest “it” thing is worth any investment. You would probably have to commit me to a county lockup if you took away my iphone or my new netbook. It's kind of silly to even make that statement because I survived for 30 years without either of those things. Alas, it just makes things so much easier right? Maybe, maybe not. I don't even want to think about how much time I spend looking at a screen instead of my kids' faces. It certainly has made communication more convenient, but it is somewhat amusing when you go to a crowded location, especially if people are standing in line somewhere and everyone has their faces down. Texting, status updating, tweeting, chatting, etc etc etc. I'm not condemning this behavior. Believe me, I am very guilty of saying "talk to me in one minute while I check my email.” The need for immediacy is perplexing. One of my best girlfriends has her phone alert her when she has a new email, voice-mail, or Facebook message. She has over 500 “friends” and is glued to her phone. She is not alone.

There is a new trend however that I am reluctant to embrace. It could conceivably be that one thing that I live to rebel against like those people who hate Twilight but have never read the books. The E-book. Amazon has the Kindle and Barnes and Noble has The Nook. Love the name, but that's about it.

I have amazing memories of my mom taking my sister and me every Saturday to a small independent bookstore called The Little Professor. We would spend over an hour browsing the rows and rows of books. My mom would always get newspapers from other cities, my sister would always come out with a new Sweet Valley High book and I adored anything that had a preteen as the heroine. Armed with our new purchases, we'd have dinner at Red Lobster. My mom would scold my sister for reading at the table. And at Mass. And any place that had light. I'll never forget the first time she took us to Borders. It was unlike anything we had ever seen. The kid section alone was about the size of Little Professor. Our mouths dropped and our minds soared. I'm married now with two children of my own and every weekend when I say “Do you want to go to Barnes and Noble” their eyes light up and another generation of imaginations take flight.

I let them watch television. Probably a little too much. We gave our 5 year old a Nintendo DS (sometimes I let him borrow my games) and we have no shortage of Wii games. They even know what I mean when I say “I just got a text from Daddy.” Some type of electronic screen is a part of their daily lives. But, nothing compares to being surrounded by rows and rows of the written word.

I haven't bought a CD in years thanks to iTunes. I'm one of the millions of people who helped put Blockbuster out of business by signing up for Netflix. But I will not contribute to the demise of the art of book browsing by purchasing an electronic book device.
I can certainly see the appeal. I wonder if I would feel differently if I lived in an area where a regional commute was a part of my daily routine. I don't fly often, perhaps two or three times a year. But, it does get a little annoying putting a dent in my shoulder from lugging the 6 magazines, 3 books and all of my personal items in a carry on. Who wouldn't want to just have one device that would incorporate all of that and a lot more. Must...Resist...

As I write this, I'm sitting in a back section of Barnes and Noble filled with tables and people reading, writing and chatting. Six people can sit comfortably at each of the 8 tables here. On every table is a laptop. Now a few things I know for sure. I'd bet the majority of these people have computers at home . I'd bet the majority of them have some type of cellular device that connects to the internet. I'd bet that the majority of them who have headphones on are listening to ipods or some other music device where you download music. I'd bet not one of them is listening to a CD. Lot's of betting going on in my mind right now. I find it fascinating though that all of these technologically savvy people went to a bookstore to conduct this business. What is it about this place that draws people even if they are not looking at books? Something in the air I think. Something on the shelves.

As I leave, I'll pass by the Nook kiosk where some guy talks to you about the benefits of owning the latest E-reader that apparently has a month long waiting list to receive. I'm gonna walk right by and hope and pray that this little booth is about as big as his job will get. The prospect of shelves and shelves slowly diminishing because demand for reading them on a screen is higher...that's a bet I'm not willing or ready to make.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-04T12:39:00.012-06:00

My new year's resolution is to stop spending so much time being nosy on Facebook and blog more. So now that I have stated that, here is what has been on my mind lately.

I read a lot of trash. Online and in print. Sometimes it's called celebrity gossip or guilty pleasures. Lately, I have been wanting to call it trash because it seems to fill my mind with things that are unnecessary and actually harmful. You might think that a little indulgence into this other world isn't so bad. True, if you can handle it. I'm starting to think I can't. First it was little questions like "How can I get my makeup like JLo's?" Flawless. So, trips to the MAC counter ensued. Frustration followed after accepting I never will! Then, that little voice says,
"Kimmi, JLO has a team of people who follow her around everyday to insure that her makeup is flawless, throw in some paparazzi with a few "candid shots" of her shopping on Rodeo and then she winds up looking fantabulous in that rag mag on your kitchen counter top."

But I want to style my hair like Beyonce's (when she doesn't look like a lion) and get extensions or cut it real short like Posh Spice and strut around with my new Birkin.
The voice: "Kimmi, Beyonce spends hours getting her hair done daily. Do you see Beyonce trying to keep up with two toddlers? And since when were you a Spice Girl? Posh didn't buy her Birkin, one of her 3 personal assistants probably did."

But how do these women have six pack abs a few short months after giving birth! I just need to stop eating. The last six pages of my US weekly were all about various diet pills endorsed by people I see daily on television. I mean the magazine devoted 28 pages to Diet's That Work. It's how Britney lost her belly fat.
The voice: "Ever heard of Air brushing? Oh and Britney is definitely an inspiration."

When I read this as I'm typing, I think about how silly and almost sad it all sounds. The constant "want want want" as if there is something wrong with what I have. The notion that I would even look at these people as something to aspire to almost makes me feel ashamed. But, then I'm thankful that I can hear that little voice. I may not listen, but I can hear it. I'm not sure if a 17 year old navigating her life using a tabloid weekly as her study manual would be as discerning.

And it only seems to be getting worse. Shows about what not to wear, what not to eat, what not to drive, what not to read. It's just too much. So, I have to check myself sometimes. Are my basic needs being met? Is my family healthy and happy? How can I help someone else today? Very simple questions that I'm sure I won't find in the checkout counter with a half naked Jennifer Aniston on the cover. (who looked amazing by the way) The voice: can you say trainer trainer trainer.

I could eat a few more vegetables. I could drink a little less soda. I won't die if I don't buy that Cole Haan burgundy patent leather hobo bag I saw in InStyle.

But, if it goes on sale...

As always, I love comments, and am always looking for new things to write about. You all check in with me and I'd love to hear from you!

This one is about Jessa

2008-11-17T11:59:00.005-06:00

My daughter. My Daughter. I can honestly say that now is the time I am seeing Jessa's personality. Jessalyn is a lot of something in a little body. She's now starting to realize that she cannot cry and whine and get whatever she wants. She understands the word "no" and what that means and what happens when you don't listen. It is amazing how different my children are. The naughty step was hell for Braedon. He hated it. He still hates it. Jessa didn't care. I'd sit her down there and firmly tell her not to do whatever she did and she'll listen and sit. I'm waiting for her to cry ro be upset that she was removed from our presence, but she'd get up a minute later and just walk back to whatever she was doing. I'm like "SHOW SOME EMOTION!" So, I starting taking her up to her room and closing the door. This get tiring hauling her up there, but she doesn't like it, so I guess that's successful! (Is that twisted?) She can't open the door on her own yet, so I'm sure I'll be revamping that technique again very soon.

She is fascinated by babies. She'll point and say "Ba-Bee" even if the child looks a little older than her! I think she equates any child being carried is a baby. I have to hold her back though because she goes right for the eyes of little ones in carriers.

She worships Braedon. And I mean WORSHIPS him. Anything he does, she wants to do. Whatever he likes, she likes. whatever sounds he makes in the back seat, she imitates them. When I drop him off at school, he puts his things in his locker and goes right in to class. There have been a few times when I had to stop her from putting her coat in there and joining the 4 year olds.

Kimmi Troy...Decorator with her motto being Pottery Barn Look on a Target Budget

2008-09-23T12:39:00.007-05:00

It's funny, before we moved, everything I bought for decorations, I'd rationalize by saying "it was for the new house." Well, now that I'm in here, I can't do that anymore! I may see a gorgeous vase from my favorite store Old Time Pottery and know that because I have no place to put it, it must remain in the store. So, now that I am aware of my spatial limitations, I have been trying to channel my inner creativity. There is a lot of wall space around this house and I'm loving searching for just right thing to put wherever. I have to love it to buy it. If I'm not sure, I walk away. So, this post really is just me putting a few things on here that are taking shape that I am pretty proud of. My own vision coming to light. I am by no means done and the work itself was pretty easy.

These dots are addictive. I'm alwyas walking around the house wondering where I can stick colorful dots on the walls. They look like they were painted on. They are called Wall Pops and available at Lowes. The letters I love because you are actually supposed to nail them into the wall. I was not about to put that many holes in that wall so I got some double sided foamy sticky tape and hung them that way. They are stuck to the wall pop so when Teenage Jessa decides to take them down, no damage to the wall!

I have always wanted an entryway I could put things in. So, this space to me was the most important and my favorite. The chest is my favorite piece furniture in the entire house. the kids like to open the drawers, I don't store much in it. Just pictures I need to hang in the gallery or the bubble wrap that goes around those pumpkins.

I have always loved a stairway gallery. When touring this home while on the market, not having the space to achieve this would have been a deal breaker. I also wanted my kids to see these historical photos from both families and be reminded that they are a part of some amazing people.

Kimmi T. and the family

2008-09-05T13:08:00.003-05:00

Auntie Kelli, Papa Al and Gamma all came out last weekend and spent two days with us. It was so nice for us all to be under one roof. It always takes Jessa some time to warm up to people she thinks are new but Braedon was so excited the minute they all walked in the door. Of course, Jessa decided to get friendly when they were packing up to leave!

More Pics

2008-09-05T12:02:00.002-05:00

Hanging out with Papa Al's favorite mascot, Sparty at the College Football Hall of Fame.

A Michiana Summer Comes to an End

2008-09-03T19:37:00.003-05:00

It's been a fantastic summer! I took the kids to a beach on Lake Michigan and they had a blast. Braedon had been to a beach in Milwaukee but never really got in the water and this was Jessa's first time even seeing a beach up close. She wasn't so sure about it. She was fascinated and just enjoyed playing in the sand...and eating it. Braedon, a child who fears sprinklers, simply fell in love with the beach. I mean, he was begging me to teach him how to swim and kept wanting to go deeper and deeper. He had a ball and I was so happy to see how enthusiastic he could be about water. Ben and I really aren't water people, but I thought why not. It's 90 degrees, it's Labor Day and we live like 40 minutes from a Great Lake. I'm glad we went. Next summer, we will definitely make some more trips.

Being Silly

2008-08-19T21:18:00.003-05:00

Fun times with Jessa

2008-08-19T20:25:00.003-05:00

Apparently eating for Jessa is soooooo tiring!

Jessa's first ride on a merry-go-round. She kept spinning herself and wouldn't hold on.

This is my favorite dress of Jessa's.
She won't be able to wear it much longer and I might shed a tear.
For the dress that is, not because she's growing. That's supposed to happen.

Whenever she does this I yell "FISHFACE!" Oh, and she was real proud of herself for sitting in the chair like a big girl.
She's not a huge fan of the high chair.

She and Braedon fight over this cart like it's a bag full of gold. If I say "How about if I put it in my room and No ONE will play with it!" one more time. Such a mom threat.

Has It Really Been a Month...

2008-08-04T13:25:00.004-05:00

This summer has flown by so fast. not much to report. We are all good! Braedon is enjoying school and wishes he could go everyday all day. Jessa thinks she's 4 and is quite physical. The biting phase is in full effect and Braedon is usually the victim. I remember when he went through the same thing about this age and I take comfort knowing it will end.

Jessa's hair is the first thing people comment on. She has a lot! She won't keep a bow in there for very long so it just kind of hangs in front of her face like a mop. But, it's a cute mop.

My favorite pic of the summer. This was not posed.
They were messing around and I was quick and lucky enough to capture it.

It was so hot at this Brewer game and we were right in the sun. So, Braedon and I left a little early right after the Sausage races.

Posing with Braedon's FAVORITE sausage, The Hot Dog!

Braedon puts signs on his door that say "KEEP OUT JESSA" yet, he is always in her room!
And she adores him.

Settling In

2008-07-09T14:23:00.003-05:00

Well, to say the least, moving with two toddlers has been an adventure. An adventure I NEVER want to experience again. Braedon was very well behaved. He took the move so well. Everything was new to him and he just loved it. He started school last Monday and just went right on in there without even looking back. He loves his bedroom which was decorated by Daddy with a baseball theme. Then there's Miss Jessa. What can I say about Miss Jessa. Nuts. Wild. Passionate. Untameable. That pretty much sums it up. She wants whatever Braedon has.

We are trying to get a routine established. We just joined a gym where Braedon cried because he didn't want to leave the play area...(good sign) and we feed the fish in our backyard lake everynight after dinner. The people here are sooo friendly and we feel so welcomed. I'm tired, but really loving this change.

Braedon builds...

Jessa breaks...

Everybody has their favorites. Don't be fooled though. Jessa is not a budding artist. She's trying to determine which color crayon will taste the best.

More pics

2008-07-09T13:56:00.003-05:00

Jessa, anticipating yet another delivery.

Braedon, claiming one.

Saying goodby

2008-07-08T19:53:00.001-05:00

Even though we were excited about moving, it was bittersweet when we thought about the people we were leaving behind. We are just a few short hours away, but it's still different.

My Mocha Moms group who supported me soooo much. Words cannot even describe these amazing women who were so different from one another. Our common bond was motherhood and let me tell you, I may not be here if it weren't for them.

Quite possibly the most caring and giving family we have ever met. We were lucky enough to live across the street from them. I know we were put on that street for many reasons and they were one of them.

And last but not least, I can't even count how many times I called Baba and asked for a break from the kids to have some Kimmi time. I was truly blessed with an amazing mother in law whom I adore and get along so well with. Seriously.

Miniblog

2008-06-14T21:11:00.008-05:00

I know I have been neglecting this blog thing. It has been a really busy time for us. Lots of packing going on as we prepare to move. Moving a household with two little ones is extremely challenging. I really haven't had time to think about anything except trying to block out chunks of time to pack. So, I probably won't be blogging about anything really noteworthy until things settle down and we are in our new home. Give me about two weeks and Kimmitroy.blogspot.com will be back. Ummm, better make that three.

Even with a sinus infection, Jessa always smiles for the camera. She's all about attention now. When she starts to fuss after being in a store, someone could pass by and smile at her then she immediately stops and smiles back.

Braedon may have given up on naptime, but naptime hasn't given up on him.

At our new house last weekend, Braedon had nowhere to sit to eat his granola bar. So he went outside and sat on the deck and simply said, "I'll just sit here and look at the beautiful lake."

A Day at the Park

2008-06-14T20:35:00.000-05:00

A day in the life of Braedon

2008-05-23T20:37:00.005-05:00

Enjoying the train at the zoo. Braedon loves the zoo. He loves the carousel, the train and the playground. He doesn't really care about the animals. Needless to say, we won't be going back anytime soon.

Running the bases at T-ball.

Catching up on current events.

Most of you that know me know that in spite of how conservative I am, I don't really care too much about politics. I am however truly enjoying the fact that Braedon wonders why he's seeing the same three people on television all of the time. We talk about them running for the presidency and how it's like a big game to see who will be in charge of the whole country. There are also no words to describe showing my child pictures of three incredibly determined people, who look totally different from one another racing for the White house. At age 4, He has no idea how historical it is. To him it's just John, Barack, and Hillary. I find that pretty incredible and glad he's able to witness it.

A day in the life of Jessa!

2008-05-23T20:05:00.006-05:00

Enjoying the train ride at the zoo.

Looking cute.

Yeah. They don't look ANYTHING alike!

All those toys and yet emptying a cabinet's contents into the oven bottom is Jessa's favorite pastime.

And now the best for last!

Jessa's 1st haircut

2008-05-07T21:48:00.006-05:00

I know I have been a little MIA lately. I just haven't had time to fully develop a good posting. Between reading TMZ and Us weekly, I have been pretty swamped. But alas, it was a slow news week. I'm working on two new posts for Sunday. Until then, enjoy these latest pics of the kiddies. And yes, Jessa got a haircut. It was in her eyes too much and she would constantly pull out her bows. I already caught a "oh no you didn't" lecture from my mom about it! It's still big and beautiful though. Just with a little more shape.

Messing Around

2008-05-07T21:22:00.000-05:00

Daddy amusing himself at Jessa's expense. She liked it though.

A moment of actually sharing.

And then it was over.

I took these moments after Braedon woke up in the morning.

There was just something so fresh about his face. It was a little puffy and so well rested. I thought he just looked beautiful and I had to capture it.

Notre Dame vs. Notre Dame

2008-04-23T13:45:00.006-05:00

We went on our annual pilgrimage to the Blue and Gold game at ND last weekend. It was Jessa's first trip to the Bend and we also showed Braedon our new house! He of course wanted to go in, and is having a bit of trouble understanding that someone else lives in "our" house right now.

Princess Jessa

Enjoying her first "game" inside Notre Dame stadium

The Fam

Not sure what is going here, but thought I'd put the picture in anyway.

Party Time!

2008-04-23T13:30:00.008-05:00

Even though their birth dates are 3 weeks apart, we had a joint birthday party for Braedon and Jessa. It was a Brewer themed party and it was wonderful! I love it when our families get together because it's one of those times when I see so many blessings and so much love. Thanks to everyone who shared in this celebration from near and far!

Great Grandpa Harry

Aunt Kelli

Uncle Jon trying to teach Jessa the value of saving even though she kept opening the piggy bank.

Papa Al

Jessa's Godmother Lindsay

More Birthday Pics

2008-04-23T13:07:00.000-05:00

Gamma

Baba

Fascinated by the balloon

Best 1st birthday present ever.

A box.

Happy Birthday Braedon!

2008-04-07T22:10:00.007-05:00

Braedon spent his 4th birthday at the ballpark with Daddy and cheered on the Brewers to victory.

A day out with my Daddy.

Dressed like my favorite player, Prince Fielder.

Daddy even got my name on the jumbotron!

Second column and a bit fuzzy, but pretty cool in person!

Barely out of the parking lot, I surrendered.

Starting Early

2008-04-07T22:06:00.003-05:00

Jessa tries to do everything Braedon does and was thrilled when we got her her very first "bike." Here is what we think her thought process was while trying to figure out her new toy.

Look at me! Now I can be just like Braedon!

Okay. Now what?

Well, since nobody will help me, I might as well do one of the things I do best.

What A Day, What A Day!

2008-04-05T21:19:00.010-05:00

Well, yesterday was my birthday. I turned 30. Again. Seriously though, it truly was a birthday to remember! We went down to our new home (I love saying that) and after meeting with our realtor and some inspectors (everything is great by the way) we enjoyed visualizing our new life with his and her walk in closets. We close in June and we are just thrilled.

Well, on our drive back to Wisconsin, I received a phone call from my mom telling me that a picture of my Grandma Ruby was on the Time Magazine website in a photo essay about Dr. Martin Luther King. It was commemorating the 40th anniversary of his death. One of our cousins from Alabama stumbled upon it and emailed it to mom to confirm. After tears and a jaw drop, she did. So my mom went to Borders to see if it was in the print issue and not only online. Sadly, it wasn't. So, she picked up a special MLK LIFE Magazine and began thumbing through it. Lo and behold, on page 6, smack dab in the middle was another picture of my Grandma and Grandpa sitting in the middle of a church mass meeting with Dr. King doing his thing in the pulpit. In the posted black and white picture, my Grandma (5th from left) is standing next to a young Dr. King ready to work. I knew that my grandparents were active in The movement, but to see this, to have an image is truly priceless. I have so many emotions looking at the images. I think however, that it is not only timely that we discovered these photos on April 4th, but the manner in which I reviewed them. It just happened to be on my way back from seeing the house that I picked out, in the city I wanted, in the neighborhood I wanted and where my children will learn in the school I want them to learn in. All of this with the man that I wanted. I owe a lot to people like my Grandparents who helped make my dreams a possibility. I especially owe a lot to Dr. King.

Photo By Don Cravens/Time Life Pictures/Getty

Here's a link to the Time photo essay

Caution to the wind

2008-04-02T22:55:00.004-05:00

Forget Dora...Jessa is truly our little explorer. Braedon was much more cautious as an infant. We never had to put safety latches on toilet seats or cabinets, because Braedon just wasn't that into them. We used gates, but that was it. Jessa on the other hand is fascinated by everything. She loves putting things on her head. Her favorite headpiece is a plastic colander or a basket. She loves crawling into the bathroom. We keep the door closed all of the time, but when she hears it open, she comes tearing in trying to put her hands in the toilet or step into the bathtub. Jessa also likes the dishwasher. It doesn't matter how softly I pull the door down, if she hears one plate ding, she's off! She actually climbed up onto the door of the dishwasher by herself. And while I knew I'd be the one getting a time out if the door broke, I knew I had to capture it on camera. A few days ago, she got into a cabinet that had some kids crafting supplies in it. I kept telling her "no" to which she reacted like I banned her from eating forever. Well, she kept going back to the cabinet. Finally, I put a gate in front of it. She crawled over to it. The gate fell on her and she just wailed. I looked at her and said "I bet you won't be going back to that cabinet anymore huh?" And she hasn't.

A Day at the Park

2008-04-02T22:33:00.003-05:00

Dare I say it? Could it be that Spring has actually sprung? We went outside twice today! This morning we went to the park and after rest time (aka Mommy's quiet time) we played baseball outside. It was still a little cool, but very sunny. Hopefully this is the end of cabin fever.

Some interesting things Braedon said this week:

On March 31, he asked if it was still March. I said yes. He replied "Hopefully it will go out like a lamb." He's has really been attached to that quote March comes in like a Lion and out like a lamb.
While I'm making dinner each night I watch reruns of Beverly Hills 90210 on the SOAP network. Braedon saw the theme song and asked if this was the Soap show (it has the little SOAP logo in the corner) I told him it was called 90210, not the SOAP show. He then said, "No, I think it's "The Hills" All I could do was laugh and feel slightly ashamed.

Hoppy Easter

2008-03-24T20:37:00.006-05:00

Why is it that out of the hundreds of pictures I took in their Easter best, a perfect one emerges but it's BLURRY!! On Easter night, I watched a bunny sitting in our front yard probably freezing it's tail off. I felt kind of bad for it, because during last week's thaw, it could have dug a whole for some little bunny babies only to wake up and find them covered under a foot of snow. I certainly hope not. Ben said that''ll be one less bunny to munch on his flowers once spring actually gets here.

A BIG Thank You from Blogland!

2008-03-24T20:22:00.003-05:00

Thanks to all of the peeps out there who not only read my blog, but also post comments. I try to write not only about things going on in my life but things I find relevant that could impact others as well. Silly or not, I feel like this adds so much to my life's purpose. When I find out exactly what that purpose is, you can rest assured, I'll write about it!

Love, Kimmi

Going Nuts!

2008-03-11T20:13:00.011-05:00

You walk into Borders Bookstore. Right in front of you is a small table where they are giving away free Famous Amos chocolate chip cookies. Hoping to get a nice soft and chewy one, you pop one of the mini bites into your mouth and begin chewing and walking to your favorite literary section. You notice something doesn't feel right. You have already swallowed the cookie and you retreat back to the front door where you picked up the tiny dessert. You examine the plate closely. Your suspicions are confirmed and you know you only have a few minutes to get to the nearest Walgreens.

You are at a wedding of one of your high school friends. The reception is wrapping up and you are preparing to leave. At your place setting there is a tiny gold box with a Godiva chocolate logo on it. Inside are two what seem to be chocolate kisses. The first one is delicious. Pure, gourmet, delectable chocolate. You bite into the second one. Identical in appearance, but this one is crunchier. You stop chewing, discretely spit it into your dinner napkin and drink a full glass of water hoping to wash out the tiny bits of allergen you know your body can't handle. The nearest drugstore is closed. You know you have some Benadryl at home, if you can just get there. You make it but you know it's too late. You try to make yourself vomit. You try to drink a lot of milk, but your throat is closing up. You are scared but your not crying. You have been through this before. You are now on your way to the hospital.

You are visiting a friend in New York. You are enjoying a walk in Soho and come across a pastry stand. Being the cautious consumer you are, you specifically ask the vendor if there are any nuts in the chocolate filled croissant you are just dying to have. She says no. She wraps it up and you take it back to your friends, apartment. You take a few bites. No chocolate yet. Finally you get to the center of it hoping for a small treat. 10 minutes later you are in the bathroom and your friend is calling 9-1-1. Being curled up on the floor felt like hours but it was only moments that your friend opened the door for the EMT's. One hour later you are connected to an IV and you don't even remember the ambulance ride.

These are accurate stories of experiences that happened to me in the last 10 years. I have an allergy to tree nuts. Cashews, Almonds, Macadamias...you name it. All except peanuts. (Which isn't really a nut) I wanted to write about this because I think all people need to have a glimpse of what it is like to live with food allergies and how we can all make things a little easier for people like us. Now you might be thinking, "Why should I care about this when it doesn't affect me?" My motivation is to educate you so that you make informed decisions. I know I sound all serious, but it's a serious thing. If you have never experienced it, I cannot fully describe to you what it feels like to ingest something your body will painfully reject. Even writing about this was difficult because I can feel the tingling in my mouth at this very moment. It won't materialize into anything, but it's that deep.

We are now living in a world of peanut and nut free schools which I think is fantastic. More and more kids are turning up with more allergies then ever before. Some medical circles think it's because we are so into anti-bacterial everything that are bodies don't know what are good germs and just want to fight off everything. Some people think the rise can be attributed to eating habits and over consumption of processed foods. No one really knows.
The FDA now mandates that foods in the grocery stores have the allergy information by the list of ingredients. I used to think this was a bit over the top but every couple of years, as careful as I am, something happens to me in the allergy department that could have been prevented if only someone had known. I went to a shower once where a bowl of nuts was on a table. The extended period of time I smelled them sent my body into minor attack mode. Fortunately, I carry Benadryl tablets with me in my wallet everywhere I go. I also have a girlfriend whose son has a serious allergy to peanuts. He was affected by residue on another child's clothing he played with. This is serious and the more we are informed the safer our children can be. So, I may be arrogant in writing this, but hey, arrogance might save you an ambulance ride at 1 am or even a lawsuit.

Never give a child you don't know highly allergenic foods like peanuts, nuts, or fish. Holidays are notorious for having peanuts or nuts in their candy. Some kids just don't know how to say no.

If you are caring for another child for five minutes or an extended period of time, always ask the parent if there are any allergies you should be aware of. Don't worry about sounding like a doctor. The parent will always appreciate the effort.

Don't automatically assume that if a child is having an allergic reaction that giving them Benadryl will help. Some people are actually allergic to Benadryl!

If you have nuts in candies or in open bowls for entertaining purposes, display them on a separate table with a little note saying this is the "nutty table."

NEVER cross contaminate. I was once at a Brunch buffet at a restaurant where the same spoon was being used for a lasagna and for a pasta with pesto. I asked the chef if the Pesto had nuts in it (which most pesto does) and after confirming, he thanked me and got another spoon and put it in the lasagna. I didn't touch it because the damage was already done. But, he appreciated it.

Also, be aware that many restaurants use Peanut Oil instead of Vegetable Oil because it's cheaper.

For your own children, avoid giving them highly allergenic foods until they can verbally tell you where they are feeling strange.

Read the labels. Even on beauty products.

I used a chap stick that seemed to work well. It always made my lips feel a little funny, but nothing to make me suspicious. Then one extremely dry day, I used a lot on my lips. Then poof. I looked like Angelina Jolie. Even though I enjoyed my new look (really I did), I knew there had to have been something nutty about the chap stick. I threw it out and hunted for a new moisturizer. I went into L'Occitane and a woman told me about this salve that had Shea Butter in it. So I'm like "cool". I kept hearing about Shea butter and how it's in everything these days. A great moisturizer. Even Johnson and Johnson's made a Shea butter wash for babies. Then she told me it was a nut!!! After Wikipedia confirmed it, I went on a rampage in my makeup cabinet and threw out several things that had Shea Butter in them. The hand lotion that softened my hands but made them puff up for a few minutes. The Extra Moisturizing Lotion...Garbage. Extra Moisture Body Wash...Gone. The hair butter that I used to quench Jessa's curls...tossed. (That one really freaked me out because that's my child and you don't mess with my child!) Perhaps these warning labels should be on cosmetics too.

Anyway, enough of my rant. However, I do hope it will aid you in being a little more careful as we interact in this small world. Better to be safe than sorry. By the way, in the quest for the perfect lip moisturizer, I opted for the old standby, ChapStick. Nothing beats a classic. And no EpiPen required.

For more information, check out these links
Food Allergies: When Food becomes the enemy
Food Allergies with Kids
Food Allergy Initiative

Fun with Daddy

2008-03-03T14:19:00.002-06:00

More Cuteness

2008-02-27T13:50:00.004-06:00

Making a Move

2008-02-26T11:14:00.010-06:00

I can't believe that it's almost that time. Moving time. I mean, you dream about something for so long and it seems so far away and then all of a sudden you are packing up boxes in the basement. I have never been more excited about buying packing tape and Styrofoam peanuts as I am right now. And while another chapter of our book comes to an end, I think about starting over yet again. I am starting to accept that life is about finishing up and starting over and over and over. Ben says I was just as worried about leaving Alabama a few years ago and moving here. I wondered if I would make friends and develop relationships like the truly meaningful ones I did down there. And I did.

So, now I'm a little nervous about meeting new people, creating a new network and building lasting relationships. In college I developed lifelong friendships in this sisterhood called Saint Mary's. I couldn't even imagine duplicating that when we moved to Alabama. Then I met my first two grown-up girlfriends. These two women I still keep in touch with today. They threw my baby shower when I was pregnant with Braedon and became two of my closest friends. Then we moved back to the Midwest and my relationships centered around women with little kids. I could call them in my deepest darkest moments of parenthood and I knew they would understand and not judge me, but ask what could they do to help.

I have wondered a lot lately when certain phases my kids are going through will end and yet, I'm reminded that when one phase ends, another begins. We go back to being the new kid and wonder if people will like us and if we will like them. I guess it's important to remember though, that each phase is only temporary. Some last only a brief period of time and others last for years. But, they do end. And it is up to us not to compare them to an easier time in our past, but to relish them in the now. One of my favorite tee shirts from college has a quote on it saying "Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed." How appropriate in that the shirt was from a Freshman Orientation.

Braedon's true passion.

Braedon begged me for days to get the paints out.
Reluctantly, I did. He spent less than 10 minutes with this activity.
I was a bit peeved, but he seemed to enjoy himself.

I call this Recreating the Womb.
I found Jessa in this position when I went in to wake her up from a nap.
Hilarious, yet alarming at the same time.

Now I must stroke my ego for a bit. I think this is a fantastic shot.
Probably one of my favorite pictures of her.

And then there is that fantastic smile that just keeps getting better with age.

My Funny Valentines

2008-02-12T21:17:00.005-06:00

A rare moment of mutual adoration.

This face landed him TWO valentines from a girl in school and a marriage proposal from another.

Doesn't she always looks like she is bursting with glee?
Jessa rarely cries. Just keep her fed and she's all smiles.
Which I guess explains why she is always so jolly.

I was tickling Braedon like crazy to get this shot.

He pleaded for his life, and loved every minute of it.
Okay, I'll admit it. He CAN be a hot mess, but he is a cutie pie.

Serenity NOW!!!! (With a Video)

2008-02-12T11:31:00.002-06:00

It's official. I hate winter. Jessa brought in some mammoth cold that she seemed to do okay with but hit the adults in this house hard. Forget L.L. Cool J. What Jessa had, knocked us out. Ben got better after taking a few days off to recover and he lost 5 pounds. Best way to diet...GET SICK!! No seriously, when the bug made it's way around to me, well, I spent several hours last night getting IV fluids pumped into me because I was so dehydrated. And I had been drinking all the time!! Anyway, we are hopefully at the peak of this mountain. Prayers please!! So, to all the people I'm supposed to call and catch up via email with...so sorry but I have not forgotten about you. On a lighter note, we spent last weekend in the Bend at the ND/Marquettte basketball game. It was a no baby day for Braedon so he was particularly excited about that. Ben was just coming down with the infection from hell on that Saturday, so Braedon and I spent some time looking at neighborhoods and homes for sale. We didn't go into any, but it was quite a different experience seeing it in person as oppose to watching a virtual tour on the computer. Right now, the kids are at school so I must retreat back to the bed and catch a few Zzzz's. Which I never really have enough of. A lot of people, including myself before motherhood, don't realize that when you are a stay at home mom, you can't call in sick. It's hard to take care of yourself when you have little ones to care for too. And if they are sick...double the effort. I think my body just had enough and I wasn't doing all I needed to do to care for it. But I couldn't. I really will try and make the time though to take some Advil, drink some water, eat something. Sounds so simple doesn't it? Let me tell you though, even the simplest of tasks can be more than a notion. I wish God scheduled my sicknesses. But for now, I'll just thank him for good health insurance and an angel of a mother in law.

Babies in Troyland

2008-01-28T20:57:00.000-06:00

A plague has literally been on our house for the past two weeks and we are finally in the light at the end of a tortuous tunnel. Braedon had a cold he just couldn't shake and was diagnosed with a sinus infection. After getting over a double ear infection, Jessa had Strep, a Yeast infection and an eczema flare up. She looked like a leper. And of course I was more concerned about her face. It could cover her whole body...we can hide that. Just don't spread to the face!! Then to make matters worse, I caught her infection on my hands and feet! How weird is that! So, I have been walking around with rubber gloves on for the last few days. We are finally getting back to normal and I was able to go to my Zumba class morning. It's so nice to start off the week with a great and fun workout. Anyway, that's us physically. Mentally...Mommy needs some prayers.

Braedon has been especially challenging these last few weeks. Many people have asked how he has adjusted to having a baby sister. Well, things were okay until now. Jessa is a crawler and likes to see everything, touch everyone and be everywhere. And that is not cool with Braedon.

Braedon wants Jessa to:
A) Go back into Mommy's tummy
B) Stay at home alone when we go out
C) Remain in her room forever
D) All of the above

Yep...You guessed it. All of the above. I know it's normal. I know it's normal. I know it's normal. But, it is a little hurtful to me to hear him say things like that. Ben says it hurts me because I'm a younger sibling. (Care to chime in Kelli?) As a result, Braedon has really been acting out with me. Defiance, Asking "Why?" whenever I ask him to do anything, basically just not listening. It really took it's toll on me and I just broke down into tears one night. Oh yes, you can love your child and not really like them at the same time. Sound harsh? I'd bet my life that there are millions of other moms who feel the same way. At least I hope so.

Then, the storm broke, the clouds parted and an angel appeared. My big sister came to visit!! Immediately, we started joking and laughing. I hadn't heard my own laugh in so long, I forgot what it sounded like. She was basically Braedon's playmate for three days and just came in when I really needed her. Of course, the day she left Braedon started acting out again. And when I thought to myself that I was going back to my own personal hell, Ben said something that struck a cord with me. He asked me what could we do to get that Kimmi back that was around when Kelli was here. I said it was like she was the breath of fresh air. She was the sun and everything just brightened up. Then he said "Well, YOU are the one who opened the curtains to allow her sunshine in." And that was it. That pretty much summed it up. Braedon was going through his thing, but he did not control me. I control me. I have to figure out how I am going to deal with this phase. I have to step up and realize that two people having a temper tantrum does not make the situation any better. I have to realize that this will pass and we will be going through a new phase soon enough. And someday, when Jessa is going through a really rough time, her big brother will come knocking on the door with arms wide open ready to help in any way he can.

New Pics

2008-01-26T20:23:00.000-06:00

Hi Dada!

2008-01-16T12:11:00.000-06:00

I am so smart...SMRT...I mean SMART

2008-01-15T19:49:00.003-06:00

Well, now that the holidays are over, we are settling down back into our routine. Braedon and Jessa are both back in school we are mostly free of ailments. Jessa is still taking Meds for a double ear infection to which I had no idea she had. She just acted in such good spirits. But, that mother's intuition...I just can't ignore it and I'm glad I didn't. She's definitely back to her chipper self. Braedon continues to keep us on our toes. He still loves school and his teachers. Jessa is also doing well. They always talk about how good she is and how she rarely cries. People who care for her at the Athletic Club day care always ask me if she ever cries! She's a dream baby and it's going so fast, but we are enjoying it everyday. And she just idolizes Braedon. She watches him with such intensity and adoration.

So, I'm in House Cleaning mode, making trips to Goodwill like every other day to drop off stuff we don't need or haven't used in a while. I try to stick to my policy of "If I haven't used or worn it in two years, it's gotta go." It's tough, but you do what you gotta do.

Now, I know I posted this list of books I wanted to read and I'm about a third of the way through A Thousand Splendid Suns (which is amazing by the way.) but, I'm taking a breather to read the Unauthorized Biography on Tom Cruise. I know...I know...I'm almost ashamed to put that on here. Almost. I'll let you know how it goes. I'm sure I'll finish it in like 2 days. He's like a freak accident...you just HAVE to look.

Not much else is going on...we are just hanging in there waiting for the temperature to get above freezing. It'll happen at some point. Maybe in April..if we are lucky!

I'm going to try and finish each post with a product that I have tried and would recommend to anyone. I know...random thoughts, but if I can help just one person out there...then maybe this world could be a better place. (Insert sarcastic eye roll here.)

This one time in my hubby's car, the window was all foggy and frosted over because of the winter weather. So, like an idiot, I was in a rush and couldn't wait for the defroster to thaw things out so I used my hand. This temporarily fixed the problem, but then you could see my hand wiping on the glass for weeks thereafter. Seeing through the window at night with oncoming headlights was a nightmare. I called myself trying to fix it by using those Windex wipes. Big mistake. Made it even worse. Apparently, car glass is different then regular house glass. Whatever. Well, the other day I left an unopened can of sprite in my car and it exploded overnight from being so cold. My windshield was covered with frozen Sprite droplets. Now, I learned my lesson last year and knew what not to use. So, I drove to Target and discovered Windex Multi Task glass cleaner which said it was safe to use in your car on glass. And it worked! It took some scrubbing, but I was pretty proud of myself. And you can use it on the dashboard. now, there are lots of Kimmi things that happened in this story and perhaps only I would be excited about this major find, but I think at least one of you out there will go to your local Tar-Jay, spot the product and think of me. Awww...

Can't see my videos? See if this helps.

2008-01-14T20:06:00.001-06:00

If you can't see my videos, make sure you have downloaded the latest version of the Adobe Flash Player. My old website used Realplayer, so this is a bit different. See if that helps!

Click Here to download.

You found me!!!

2008-01-10T16:19:00.001-06:00

Hey everyone! I know, this web address will have to be bookmarked because I am no longer at kimmitroy.com :(
But, I was just having too many problems with the program I was using and the uploading took forever!!! So, I'm moving everything over to blogger. This should be a little easier for me to update plus I think my videos come in a bit clearer here. So thanks for checking in and I'll write more this weekend on what we have been up to since Christmas. Here's a preview...4 pink eyes, 3 Christmas colds, 2 ear infections, and allergies from an undercover nut tree!

She's on the move!!

2008-01-10T16:03:00.000-06:00

2008-01-10T15:31:00.000-06:00

Just Checking In

2007-12-13T20:27:00.000-06:00

I have been sooo MIA lately. I always forget how busy the holidays are. We always try to do our Christmas shopping online as to avoid the crowds. It's like the moment you step into a mall this time of year, it just gets so hectic and stressful and you forget about what Christmas is really all about! Anyway, we are chugging along. We were all sick for like all of November. I had a virus first, then passed it to Jessa who passed it to Braedon who bestowed it onto Ben. Then I had pneumonia! Which is frightening not for me, but because I am around the kids all day long and I did not want a toddler or a baby with pneumonia. So, Jessa decided she'd get an ear infection. We kept Amoxicillian in business let me tell you. Anyway, we are all doing well now. (Knock on wood) Braedon continues to amaze us with some of the things he says. He loves to correct people, especially me. And if I'm really angry for something he did (like pulling the stopper out of the sink or putting towels in a tub full of water) he will say sorry, then either laugh or say "Are you happy?" You either want to snatch him or crack up. He also is practicing the art of using his sister to get what he wants. He tried to convince me the other day that Jessa wanted a Thomas the Tank Engine book and we should get it for her. Or that she wanted to watch Dora which happens to be on his favorite Nick Jr. DVD. I think it takes a lot talent to be frustrating and amazing at the same time.

Which leads me to Jessa. She is the happiest baby I have ever seen. No really. When I take her to the day care at out athletic club, they always ask me if she ever cries or if she has a temper because she is just soooo agreeable. Even at night when she goes to bed, she just smiles and coos and laughs. I really have to tear myself away because I could smile at her and hug her all night long. I really regret that my Grandma Ruby didn't get a chance to meet her. I think of that often. Braedon seems to sense her presence around occasions that meant something to her. The last gift she gave to him was a stuffed lamb. We call it the Ruby lamb. He almost never sleeps with it or plays with it. After not touching it for months, he decided to sleep with it on her birthday last March. Mind you, we never said anything about this day to him. Then, this past thanksgiving, which was a big holiday for her, he wanted to sleep with it again. Again, no mention of the significance of the day or it's historical meaning to us. Less coincidental and more divine, I think.

So, I am trying this new aerobics workout called ZUMBA. It's a Latin/Caribbean dance workout where you burn like 500+ calories in 1 hour. (CRAZY RIGHT!!) It's soooo addictive. Other than that, nothing much is new here. We are just trying to keep warm in this frozen tundra called Wisconsin.

Thanks a lot for checking in and hopefully I'll post another blog soon. Something a little more thought provoking perhaps. :)

Just had to put this on here

2007-11-10T21:38:00.001-06:00

I discovered this on YouTube and I just had to put it on here because it was one of the most amazing performances I have ever heard. My mouth dropped about 10 seconds into this and stayed open until the very end. Unbelievable!! I think I smell fresh ink on someone's new recording contract! Her name is Charice Pempengco and she has a Myspace page here. http://www.myspace.com/charicepempengco

In a nostalgic mood

2007-08-19T21:25:00.000-05:00

I know I know...This post has been a long time coming! It has been such a busy time for me. I have had the privilege of spending some quality albeit brief time with some great friends these last few weeks. I drove to South Bend to visit my college roommate Liz and meet her gorgeous blue eyed daughter. I got to have a long leisurely breakfast with my girl Stacy and we had one of those talks where you know you could just spend HOURS gabbing, gossiping and gurgling (as Jessa did!) One of my closest friends, Mary Kay, was in town for a wedding and I know we would have closed the Cheesecake Factory down if we had the time. It got me to thinking how lucky I was to have all of these people in my life from college whom I still keep in touch with. I loved Saint Mary's. And I mean, I LOOOOOOOVED it! Didn't appreciate it while I was there, and nearly got kicked out (but that's another blog for another time :) I just think it was divine in the way that these people came into my life. We sometimes mistake these events as coincidence or just random occurrences, but I use divine because something bigger than all of us brought us together. It's those friendships that are the most valuable where you could go months without talking to someone then pick right up where you left off with no hard feelings. I am dumbfounded when I think about the notion that I started Saint Mary's 11 years ago. And yet here we are, with so many life changes and miles between us yet we still come together as SMiC Chicks! I'd imagine that people in a sorority feel very similar to have that sisterhood bond.

It's football season so we have South Bend on our list of travels a few times this year and the minute I take that Notre Dame Exit 77, I smile. Seeing all the current students; I can't help but feel a little envious and longing to go back and attend Mass in my pajamas, skip my 9am Biology class, close down the bar while dancing on a table, make a midnight run to Meijer, and order Papa John's at 2am. I might even study a little bit harder. Those current students have no idea how good they have it. Someday, they WILL figure it out. I only hope that on that day, they can look back at college with the fondness that I do.Me and Mary Kay

Jessa and Stacy

My freshman year roommate Liz

You know I WAS a star in my former life...

2007-08-05T16:42:00.000-05:00

So, I have discovered this new store that is my absolute FAVE!!! I am a loyal Gap shopper and have been since it was my first job ever! Hasn't everyone worked at a Gap sometime in their life? But, every once in a while, I like to branch out to a little more trendy stores that are fabulous in fashion but not in price. Enter the White House, Black Market. This is one of those stores I always walked by and never really thought anything about until I had nothing to do and thought I'd explore. I am so glad I did. So I bought my first post baby, hide my gut, fabulous dress from here and this post is just created for showing it off.

My don't I look pretty pose

My red carpet posing for paparazzi pose.
My a mommy can be a hottie too pose.

Leaving the Mommy hat at home...

2007-08-05T16:20:00.000-05:00

What an amazing weekend. My parents and I decided to surprise my big sis Kelli for her birthday. It was so hard keeping it quiet because we Monroes (Mama's side of the fam) LOVE to talk. as you can see from the first pic, she was shocked. She was just adoringly looking at her husband, who was in on it, and then looked at me and thought the following sequence:
1. That looks kind of like Kimmi
2. Wait a minute, that is Kimmi
3. OMG! Kimmi and my parents are in NY?
Pure shock, Lots of screams and you know Kelli, plenty of smiles and tears. I flew in on Friday night and left at 6am on Sunday morning. It was a quick jaunt, but I tell you, being a mom, just getting on an airplane, alone, felt like a day at the spa. We shopped till we dropped. and I dropped! I don't think I have ever walked so much in my life. I don't know how NYCers do it, but it's all what you get used to I guess. It was refreshing to feel as though I could eat crappy all day and walk it right off on the streets of Manhattan.

Torticollis, Thyroid Trouble, and a Tyrannical Toddler...OH MY!

2007-07-02T14:06:00.001-05:00

Letsee...I don't even know where to begin! It has been a crazy few weeks. I'll start with me. After turning the big 3-0, I thought it might be a good idea to see a general practitioner. I'm one of those women who really only sees the OB for doctor appointments and goes to the GP when I need something specific checked out. Well, it's been YEARS since I saw a GP and I'm glad I did! I guess my Thyroid hormone levels were a little off so they wanted to run more tests. I was quietly freaking out but thankfully, everything was fine after further tests. I guess this is common in post pregnancy and it will just have to be monitored in the next few months while my hormones stabilize.

Now for news about big mama. That's what I call Jessa. I love to pinch her thigh rolls. I call them ham hocks. You know it's not just Similac in that bottle. It's collard greens and corn bread! Anyway, during the last few months in my pregnancy, Jessa hung out in one position the whole time. So, however she was contorted in utero, when she came out, she liked one side of her neck better then the other thus causing a stiffening of the neck muscles on one side. This is called Torticollis and it is very easily correctable. She also got a little flat head because of this and will most likely need a helmet in a few months. No big deal. I'm glad the pediatrician caught it this early because apparently you can have real problems later on with your jaws and head alignment. We do massages and various exercises to strengthen the neck muscles and give her tummy time which you are supposed to do anyway with all babies. We have to limit the swing use too. I was VERY upset about this. First, I thought it was my fault she got this torticollis because she was in the swing too much. Then I got upset that this would put and end to those 7 hours sleep stretches she'd have in there rocking back and forth. The PT told me it was nothing I did, but the swing habit had to be broken. It hasn't been too bad. She'll sleep for about 5 hours in the crib then eat then sleep for another 2 hours or so. Jessa is really a content baby. She is so calm and relaxed. I am definitely enjoying this baby experience the 2nd time around. It kind of makes me sad that I didn't revel in this age with Braedon. I just kept waiting for him to grow up. I'll let you know when that happens! Jessa however doesn't have the reflux Braedon did, so putting her down right after a feeding is easy. She rarely cries and can amuse herself in the crib long enough to get something constructive done (like play Super Mario Brothers).

Now that other one, the little tyrant we like to call Braedon, he is something else! Whoever said the twos were terrible, obviously didn't have any experience with a three year old. We are at our wits end. The crying, the whining, the spitting in time out, the screaming, the hitting, the slamming...I could go on and on. Yes, I'm sure a lot of it is reaction to Jessa taking away some of the attention, but I mainly think it is his age. It takes a lot of strength to ignore him sometimes. The hard part about this is I have a hard time figuring out what to ignore and what to punish. I mean, he'd be going into time out every 5 minutes if I did that for every offense. I stopped spanking him on the bottom because I don't think I was hitting him hard enough. Seriously! He'd laugh! So, I now use the wooden spoon. A good 3 taps on the palm of his hand usually does the trick. Plus I can simply hold it up and he goes running. But even then, we only spank as a total last resort. I'm not sure if time out is working since he repeats naughty behavior. He may not repeat the exact thing, but he'll do something else he's not supposed to. Throw in the refusal to poop on the potty and you've you some pooped out parents. I think the most frustrating part in all of this is that there is NOTHING we can do but wait this stage out. When I'm thrown for a loop with something, I read. So now I'm reading 1,2,3 Magic which is this discipline technique blah blah blah. I'll let you know how it goes. It can be very difficult to know that you love your child very much but you don't particularly like them right now. But, I'm not going to feel guilty. Apparently this is very common in three year olds and it's nice to know I'm not alone.

Aaaaahhh...and this too shall pass.

Bye bye sedan

2007-01-27T15:20:00.000-06:00

Yeah yeah yeah, I know it has been forever since I have written anything! As you all might know, we are eagerly awaiting the arrival of baby Jessalyn in late April. I am in full nesting mode. The crib is in the process of being assembled. I'm painting pictures for her walls. Braedon is always in her room wanting to touch any and everything. Not to mention, it's that year for me. The big 3-0. I cringe as I type those two numbers. 30. I have been telling everyone that I'm planning on turning 29 again this year.

So, what's so bad about turning 30. People love 30. I keep hearing that the 20's are your years for figuring out who you are and the 30's are the time when you are secure with where you are in your life. These my dear friends are the ROADS of our lives.

When I graduated college, my parents helped me buy my first car. I listened to my Dad's advice and leased a brand new Nissan Altima. It was Black and sporty and it was mine. I didn't have to ask for permission to use it, I didn't have to share it with anyone. That car stood by me on my first day at a real job and had ample room in the trunk when I packed up my things after almost getting fired from my first real job. (That's another blog MAYBE I'll talk about someday.) It led me to my first apartment and my first car accident. It drove me every weekend to visit my first real boyfriend 30 miles away and carried me back home again. After we were married, my first car made it's first long road trip to Alabama and became aquainted with a new member of our family. So many firsts happened in that car. I think it was the epitome of my early 20's. Young, naive, inexperienced, sometimes foolish. And yet as I travelled on my life road, I couldn't wait to get to the next phase. Aaaahh. The Camry.

This was a car that the new hubby and I picked out together. Here I was thinking, "Oh we have two incomes now, I can step up in life." Like this car proved that I was a real woman. I didn't need to listen to anyone else because I was a new mom and had a new life and I knew all I needed to know about the world. I called myself getting older and wiser because I no longer drove around with music blasting, but with a child in the back seat trying to get him to fall asleep. And surely as that Altima drove me into a new life down south, Camry brought me back home to the midwest. My second car accident happened at Target with Braedon sleeping soundly in the back seat. Nutrigrain bar wrappers shoved under the seat becauase I was eating a lot more on the go in this life. The CD player either had the Notre Dame fight song in it or Dora's greatest hits. And as shameful as it is, I liked listening to it. Over and over again. I stopped listening to the mainstream radio in this car. Camry was all about easy listening and NPR. Then I remembered all those times I mocked my mom for listening to the very stations Camry and I were growing to love. And that is what we were doing together. Growing.

Then my tummy started growing. Again. And Camry knew the end was coming. Camry had a good run but it's own finish line had drawn near. What to do?

I can't even tell you how I agonized over this next life change. Would I still be cool? Could I still drive around looking smooth with my sunglasses, two kids and bag of snacks in a...(gasp) MINIVAN?

Is this what my next phase of life is about? Secret compartments for snacks and diapers? Fold down seats for Braedon's summer soccer gear? Power sliding doors for easy entry with a toddler and a baby carrier? Did I say good-bye to my style and youth when I signed on the dotted line? (Did I have style to begin with?) Did even Braedon sense the confusion when told me to get a big strong car like Daddy's?

The jury is still out on that debate, but I'm the one driving it right? But for now, Sienna and I have bonded. We have tackled the grocery store and donated clothes and toys to my local Goodwill. We joined the minivan parade at my local gym. We have been welcomed to the club of multiple children. We have even given Daddy a ride to work (despite his promises to never be seen in that thing). Sienna has an alumni liscense plate holder proudly displayed and even shows a little sticker love for the Irish. But, there is something Sienna has that Daddy's big strong car doesn't have. A hole in the stereo to plug my iPOD in. Now, that's cool.

It Takes a Village...To Raise a Mom

2006-10-31T20:56:00.000-06:00

Everyday I marvel at the fact that I am a mother. I still see myself memorizing the information on my fake I.D. insuring I'd get into the local college bar if the bouncer decided to quiz me. How did I get here?

Something happens to a woman when she becomes a mother. She is traumatized. Sometimes she feels like her life is over and has no one to turn to. Then she tells a girlfriend how she feels and the girlfriend says "I understand." Those two words. I UNDERSTAND. They have had such an impact on my life as a spend time with my girlfriends. Not only is Mama traumatized, she's guilt-ridden for feeling traumatized! It's an endless parade of emotions that according to my mother never goes away.

I constantly look at the other moms in my playgroups and see how they handle parenthood with such ease. At least it seems that way. I'm one of the younger moms in my set, so I'm accepting that I have a lot to learn, but who do I learn it from? I mean, really, no knows Braedon better than I do so how can I get advice from someone who has never parented my child. I'm nurturing this two-year old and who is nurturing me?

I have come to realize that not only does the big guy upstairs nurture me spiritually, but their are some pretty remarkable women down here who have opened their arms to me. One mom did my dishes when I hosted playgroup the other day. Another had me over at her house and forced me to watch a movie while she entertained Braedon and her own kids down in her basement. When I'm stressed, I get calls to make sure I'm okay and when I have doctor's appointments, another mom takes Braedon and takes it as an insult if I dare to pay her anything.

This is my village.

I didn't join my village immediately after arriving in Wisconsin. It kind of materialized. I met two people at a family center, they knew other people, some of us go to the same health club, hair salon, some of us live within 5 minutes of one another. And yet, I'm inspired by understanding that this village has raised me in this particular phase of my life. I thought I'd have the answers when I turned 30. I thought the days of wondering who I was and what my purpose here was would be written on the wall. And as each day goes by, I'm amazed that I'm still learning.

We have to support one another. Not just in times of need, but in times of calm and peace as well. I know that I'm speaking from the parenting aspect of it, but I think it applies to a lot of areas in life. Who are your peers and what do they need from you today. What do you need from them? We cannot be afraid to ask for help. We certainly cannot be ashamed. Even if it's just calling up a friend and saying "I need to talk" or "I'm ready to listen."

I heard about a study regarding babies who died who were given their basic needs like food and shelter, but had no access to a loving touch. It was like a scientific fact that we as humans need other humans. It doesn't make us less independent. It makes us who we are based on how we are programmed.

While we are so busy trying to be so many things to so many people, we cannot overlook the people that need to be something to us. It does take a village to raise a child and this time it's okay if we are still in diapers.

How would you like to die?

2006-09-20T12:46:00.000-05:00

Strange question huh? Morbid? Maybe. But I have been thinking about this a lot lately. We are coming up on the one year anniversary of my Grandma Ruby's death and it's been pretty difficult for all in my family to move on with our lives without her. But, we have. I went to another funeral last spring and the priest talked about how this person died while on his way to work to provide for his family. My grandma died while in a hospital bed holding the hand of her only daughter. My grandfather died while watching a Notre Dame football game on TV last fall. (It's okay to chuckle at that. I smile when I think about one.) But, it's the way these amazing people left this earth. Doing what they wanted to do. Dying the way they lived. Working to put food on the table and provide for your wife and children. Loving someone so much that you share your last breath with them. Sitting in your favorite seat doing what you dreamed of doing when you retired. That's how I want to die. Doing something I can be proud of. I read about a man yesterday who died while mowing the lawn. Again, someone taking care of his home, perhaps his family. Taking pride in the way his home looked to others.

I think when someone asks us how we want to die, we say "in my sleep" or "hopefully painless." When we should really be living the way we want to leave. Soldiers, Firemen, Police Officers, all those people who protect us, face death everyday. It's their job. Sometimes I can't even imagine what that must be like to stare down the barrel of a gun or run into a burning building. Yet, when I think about it, I face death everyday too. When I wake up every morning, that is a day closer to the day I leave this world.

I think about the simple things I did today and could I be proud of that if something happened.
Go to gym
Drop Braedon off at Mother in Law
Update Website
Update Blog
Take a nap
Pick up Braedon
Make dinner
Laundry/Tidy up
Email
Bathe Braedon
Watch TV and go to sleep

I believe their is merit in all of these things. Perhaps not in watching Access Hollywood before I go to bed, but I workout to stay healthy so I can keep up with Braedon and nourish the little one on the way. I leave Braedon with my MIL because it's important he know the meaning and value of family. (Oh and I get a break too.) I update my website and blog because it's my way of keeping in touch with so many of you that I rarely get to see. I take a nap, because we have to listen to our bodies when they tell us to slow down. I make dinner because we have to eat to live and I plan on doing laundry because no one likes to recycle underwear. I email because someone thought it was important to contact me about something important to them. I bathe Braedon because he can't quite do it by himself even thought he tells me he can.

You see, you don't have to be a famous person to be a hero. You don't have to make some huge scientific discovery in order to be remembered. You don't have to donate millions of dollars to some charity in order to feel good about yourself. And you don't have to be perfect to get into heaven. Just live your life day by day. And occasionally ask yourself "If I died right now, would it be a good death?"

The last thing my grandma told me was "Live for today, because tomorrow is promised to nobody." Three days later she died. And it WAS a good death.

What dreams may come...

2006-08-21T16:08:00.000-05:00

10 years ago I dreamt of long luxurious hair like the girls in the videos.
Now, I keep it as short as possible so I can spend less time in the bathroom.

10 years ago, I dreamt of choosing between a Mercedes and a Lexus.
Now, I'm trying to decide between a Sienna or an Odyssey.

10 years ago, I dreamt of buying power suits from Nordstrom.
Now, I buy Gap Outlet sweatsuits in the latest fall colors.

10 years ago, I dreamt of being a celebrity who was admired for her style and taste.
Now, I'm admired by a 2 year old because I know the words to Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

10 years ago, I dreamt of living in a loft in the heart of a bustling city.
Now, I live on a cul-de-sac in suburbia with kids in almost every house on my block.

10 years ago I dreamt of being just like Kelli Taylor in 90210.
Now, I watch her become a cokehead/killer/burn victim on SOAPnet during naptime.

I think God knows what he's doing when some of your dreams don't come true.

Are we really better off?

2006-08-17T15:46:00.000-05:00

Technology. Sometimes a blessing, sometimes a curse. During a recent trip to Lake Tahoe, I found myself thinking a lot about how far technology has come in my lifetime. I thought about the things my son will rarely or never have to experience because their is some new/better/faster way to get things done. Will the typewriter be in the Smithsonian when he is my age? Will the CD resemble a fossil? True, some things are more convenient now with technological advancements, but somethings I'm left to wonder, "If it ain't broke..." I had this little epiphany while in a bathroom in the Las Vegas airport. I pulled a new toilet cover down careful not to rip it (as I usually do) and gently placed it on the toilet. Then, as I turned to face to face the door "Whoosh!" Down went the cover. My movement activated the flush sensor. Take two. Careful placement, turn and "Whoosh" Down went the cover, AGAIN. It took three unplanned flushes for me to wish for the little handle that obeyed my hand command. Then soap sensors, that never really give you enough and the water sensor that forces you to hold your hand stone still in order to get wet. Never did going to the bathroom seem so annoying.

Snippets of our conversations:
I don't mind being without HBO for 5 days, but no TiVo? I hope the hotel computer isn't dial-up. My phone reception is bad in the mountains so just text me when you are on your way.

Just everyday jargon that may portray me as being spoiled. Hmmm. Are we spoiled?

Let's examine the culprits.

TiVo or DVR: Stands for digital video recorder.
Replaced: The VCR
Uses: Allows you to tape multiple programs as the same time and delete them at the touch of a button. Also allows you to pause and rewind Live TV. Also "remembers" shows you watch and can offer suggestions on shows you might like.
Pros: Fewer spousal arguments because one person forgot to tape the show 24 one night.
Cons: Taught two year old he can watch Dora whenever he wants and doesn't have to wait until it comes on next.

NetFlix: At home Video Rental service through the internet
Replaced: Blockbuster
Uses: You make a list of movies you'd like to rent through their website and they mail is to you. Their is a flat rate based on the package you choose and there is no late fee.
Pros: A big kiss my you know what to Blockbuster for charging late fees one minute after midnight and never having the movie I want in stock. Suckas!!!!!
Cons: Increases your internet surfing time and limits personal interaction. You really gotta know what your looking for ahead of time. Sometimes I miss the art of browsing.

Cell Phones: Portable phones
Replaced: pay phones and patience
Uses: Now you can get a hold of someone on a moments notice. If they are at work, or home, call their celly and maybe they'll pick up.
Pros: Soooo necessary at large events like football games and weddings.
Cons: Yet another toy that belongs to mommy that a certain 2 year old wants play with.
Not to mention more and more bad drivers on the road. 90% of the time they are probably on a cell phone. I'm guilty too. But I can drive and talk at the same time. Really.

iPods: Personal Digital Audio device allows you to download songs individually without having to by the whole crappy album.
Replaced: CD's and the DiscMan
Uses:Where ever you want to hear music tailored to your own likes
Pros: how about another big smooch to the record companies who charge $17.00 for a CD that took $1 to make and you only end up listening to 2 songs. Oh yeah. Sticking it to the man!
Cons: Can't really think of any as I listen to Nick Lachey sing his heart out on Itunes.

I think most of you reading this can honestly say we didn't grow up with these luxury items and we turned out okay. And we have to remember, I have to remember, they are luxury items. Without these things, life will go on. I want to teach Braedon that he doesn't have to live his life "On Demand" with his wants and needs met whenever he pleases.

Before recording devices, we waited for our favorite episode to come on and if we missed it, then maybe we'd see it years later in reruns. Before Netflix, we regularly visited our loyal Blockbuster hoping and praying that the summer blockbuster was there and swore that even though they had hundreds of video carton on the wall, thought surely they didn't have that many copies because it was ALWAYS out. Yet, we still came back and waited. Before cell phones, we believed people when they said they would be at a certain place at a certain time. Now, 5 minutes of a no-show goes by and we are quick to dial. And before iPods and iTunes we had to wait for Casey Kasem to get through all top 40 hits before hearing our favorite #1 song.

Let's face it, if we continue to let technology dictate our lives, patience will not be just a virtue; It will become obsolete.

Product Watch: Lotion and Fade Creams

2006-06-15T15:43:00.000-05:00

Whenever I buy something that I think is fabulous, I will use this to pass on the information to my goddess sisters out there who might actually care about what I have to say. I have come to LOVE two products I recently purchsed.

First: Eucerine Calming Creme. I have EXTREMELY dry skin. I mean, I used to use Lubriderm or Jergens Severly Dry Skin formulas and it was like regular lotion. My skin just ate it up. Now I don't know about you, but I don't really think about reapplying lotion throughout the day. (Especially while trying to keep a toddler busy. We moms sure do tend to neglect ourselves.) Anyway, so my dry skin. I'd scratch and scratch and need more lotion...it was a vicious cycle! So, while strolling through the aisles of Tar-Jay, I saw this. Now, I was familliar with Eucerin, but never really bought any because I just wasn't too excited about paying $10 for a bottle of lotion. this time I did. And boy, did I get what I paid for! This lotion is AMAZING!! It isn't greasy at all. It's not heavy or oily. It's PERFECT! It has oatmeal in it which calms the enflamed nerves in really dry skin. Also, in the summer, my eczema tends to flare up causing the itch cyle all over again. This really does what it says. It calms. I love it. Plus, it's safe to use on children over the age of two. So, go buy it.

Second: This is a product that I have been searching for for years. I don't know about you vanilla vixens out there, but us mocha mamas can get some pretty dark spots on our legs from scratching scabs too soon. I have a lot of spots on my legs from doing just that as a kid and the spots never really went away. I was afraid to try fade cremes because I wasn't trying to bleach my skin or lighten it. I just wanted to tone it, make it all even, esentially fade the dark spots. So, I went into Sephora and a caramel complected associate told me about some gel that had the chemical hydroquinone in it. She told me it was perfect for what I needed. Well, being the bargain shopper I am, I wasn't excited about spending $55 on a tiny jar of stuff I wasn't sure about. So, I left. Then a few weeks later, I went into CO Bigelow which is like a Sephora but more skin product oriented than cosmetic. I asked a sales lady for help and told her what I was trying to accomplish. She led me to this Japanese product called Sekkisei Cosmetic Lotion then tried to get me to also buy the Sekkisei Emulsion. Then she went on about how it inhibits the production of melanin which these spots produced too much of (thus making them darker). So I'm thinking "No this woman did not just tell me I need to stop my production of melanin!" So she tests it on my hand and tells me that it won't bleach the skin bla bla bla. Then she tells me the price and after I gasp inside, she tells me I get a cute little complementary travel pouch with some other Sekkisei products in it. Now, I will give her credit. She sounded like she knew what she was talking about. Then I asked her about some chemical I heard of (whose price was sounding better and better) and she shook her head and said flat out "No." She said it was a bleaching agent and definitely not for African American skin. This product by Sekkisei was better becasue it would even out the skin. She also mentioned I could return the products if I wasn't happy. Fair enough. Lastly she told me that I'd see results within 2 weeks. Suckered right? WRONG!!! These Sekkisei products are miracles in bottles. My mom noticed a difference and I had only been using them for about 5 days. I am also ashamed at my prejudiced thoughts about this woman just because she wasn't a person of color. Well, she clearly knew what she was talking about and I am so grateful. She said she used these products daily and it was for everyone! So, check it out. You use the Cosmetic lotion first, then the emulsion. A little goes a LOOOONG way! And it's sooooo worth it!

You can buy the Eucerin Calming Creme at Target, Walgreens, etc.
You can buy the Sekkisei Lotion and Emulsion at CO Bigelow or
order it online at NeimanMarcus.com

Course: Parenting a Toddler 101

2006-06-06T14:52:00.000-05:00

I thought I'd return to my teacher roots and develop a course syllabus for all those mommies, those mommy-to-bes, and everyone else who reads my ranting about life.

Course: Parenting a Toddler 101
Duration: 18 months-4 years
Faculty: You

Overview:

Parenting 101 will focus on the tools you need to successfully parent a child. Unfortunately, no one has ever parented your child before, so anything you learn and apply in this course is purely trial and error. There will be many successes and hopefully far less mistakes. Either way, your final grade will depend on...Wait a minute. You don't get a final grade because this course is never ending! Good Luck!

Uniform:

It is mandatory that you wear clothing that is new, crisp, cleaned, ironed and starched so that spaghettios can be smeared only minutes before you are walking out of the door to go grocery shopping.
This course also requires you to wear apparel that has only been washed with a crayon, Play-Doh and Glitter Glue

Required Reading:

On Becoming Toddlerwise
The Happiest Toddler on the Block
The Girlfriend's Guide to Toddlers
What to Expect the Toddler Years
Help! These Kids are Driving Me Crazy
Confessions of a Naughty Mommy: How I Lost and Found My Libido
Confessions of a Slacker Mom
This Child
Is
Definitely
In Trouble

Media:

Various Media resources will require viewing. Not only must you learn which episodes are repeats, but you must also learn all theme songs and sing them at random times as though they were the new hit of the summer.

Dora The Explorer
Bob the Builder
Go, Diego Go!
Blue's Clues

Tests:

Tests will be administered daily. Occasionally several times in one day. Topics covered in the tests are unknown although you can hope and pray that the topic may be found in one of the required reading books. 99% of the time however it won't.

Attendance:

Mandatory. Even with a doctor's note, you will be present.

Course Goals:

To be able to function with high energy and never enough sleep
To be able to recognize the joys of motherhood despite whining, crying, pulling, tugging, screaming, etc.
To accept that there are no perfect mothers and no one knows all the answers
To understand that what may work for one child may not work for your own
To remember that you know your child better than anyone
To not feel guilty when you are sick as a dog and your child's baby-sitter is the treasured 90 minute Dora video.
To find the balance in life and recognize that not everyone can do this but you are strong enough to make it through.
To find amusement in how small and hard that spaghettio you forgot to wipe up gets on the floor.
To remember, before you fly off the handle, to take a deep breath and say slowly: This won't last forever. This won't last forever. This won't last forever.
To accept that for this brief moment in time your child adores you, will most likely forget how you yelled at him earlier and will give you the wettest yet most sincere kiss when you ask.

Everyday is a new day. One day closer to him graduating and making an impact on the world. And it all started with you. Remember, this won't last forever.

5 fives

2006-05-25T15:16:00.000-05:00

I took this from another blogger and thought it said a lot about my personality.

Five things in my purse

Diaper (unused of course)
Lip gloss (Bare Escentuals...THE BEST!!)
Tissue (I'm a Kleenex freak and it's allergy season)
Bath and Body Works Anti-Bacterial Gel (I'm a mom)
Receipts (that I probably forgot to deduct from the debit card account)

Five things in my car

Tissue (probably used in the cup holder)
Sand toys (so Braedon doesn't try to steal anyone else's toys in the park sandbox)
Toyota car manual (opened once to see how much gas I had left once the light went on)
Glasses (the better to see you with my dear)
Pretzels (visible only if you look waaay under the passenger seat...Thrown there by a certain little someone)

Five things in my closet

Celine sundress (my first real DESIGNER fashion piece given by my late grandmother in law Colleen who had impeccable taste.)
Flip-Flops (There my new thing, comfy and colorful)
Business suits (That I haven't worn in over 5 years)
Blue and white striped sweater (Excuse me while I go sailing on my newly purchased yacht)
A rubbermaid box full of gap turtlenecks (The best brand EVER! Sometimes I go bootleg and get some from Old Navy.)

Five things in my fridge

Strawberries (I'm trying to snack on fruit rather than cookies)
Milk (Skim and 1%, YES there is a difference and I CAN taste it!)
Boston Market chicken (The only leftovers I'll actually eat)
Gatorade (Braedon calls it "dada juice")
Yogurt (Yoplait and Dannon. I just don't like the whole "fruit on the bottom" thing.)

Five things in my junk drawer

Chip clips (for when the snacking on fruit thing doesn't work out)
Pens (Perk of marrying a doctor, you reap the benefits of drug rep gifts)
Batteries (Used but not dead and you know you have them too!)
Screwdriver (For all of Braedon's toys that make noise)
Post-Its (see #2)

Book Reviews

2006-05-24T16:22:00.001-05:00

I read two books in the past few weeks. I can't tell you how nice it is to have a day care at my gym. That's where I get most of my reading done. Drop Braedon off, workout, have coffee, read and shower with no interruptions. So I read Beach Road by James Patterson. It was JACKED!!! Yes, I threw out a word from 1989. I also use "that's fresh" on occasion. It's a Kimmi/Kelli thing. Anyway, I was soooo into the book until the very end. I was MAD! The end made NO sense and James Patterson is usually a wonderful author. This book he co-wrote with someone and I was not impressed. So, don't waste your time.

Two members of my gym recommended a book to me called The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. It's on the NYTimes Bestseller list and deservedly so. This book was so unbelievable. It's about the friendship of two boys of different ethnic groups in Afghanistan pre-violence. I don't know about you, but I never really thought about Afghanistan before all of the violence. I never knew such an Afghanistan existed. I didn't know most of the violence began when soviet communists overthrew the Afghan government and basically crippled it financially and developmentally. It's an intense read to hear some of the horrific things that happen to the main characters but not depressing. I found myself not wallowing in the sadness but hoping the leads prevail in some way. I guess they do, but not without sacrifice.

I learned so much about this country in this one novel. It hasn't changed my life, but it did open my eyes a little bit more to an area of the world that I didn't care to understand before. Here is the author's website. http://www.khaledhosseini.com/

The Real Real World

2006-05-12T15:13:00.000-05:00

My good friend Jason emailed this speech Bill Gates recently gave at a High School about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2: The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one."

Us vs. Them

2006-05-08T14:59:00.000-05:00

Is there anyone else out there who is as obsessed with celebrity gossip rags as I am? I can't get enough of US weekly, People, occasionally the Star. Last weekend we went out of town, so I saw the latest issue of US weekly on the newsstand. I have a subscription and it took all of my will power NOT to buy it just to read in the car on the ride back home. It was then that I knew I had a problem. No, seriously, could this really be an addiction? Is it bad? Is it not good for my life? Maybe it's not an addiction if it's not hurting anyone. At the gym, my girlfriends and I talk about these people like we know them.

"Denise ought to be ashamed. You don't date your friend's ex!"

"I think Jessica's dad was the main reason for the breakup."

"I give Tori's next marriage less than 5 months."

"Please don't tell me Britney is pregnant again."

Now, if you know the back story to each of these statements, I might not be alone! So, I'm searching for a rationale as to how knowing little facts and tidbits from these celebrities' lives relate to mine. Average Kimmi from the midwest.Hmmm...Thinking....Thinking...Thinking.....

I go back and forth on how I feel about celebrities. I don't think most of us look up to them as role models, but I do feel like we are influenced by them. And like most things, there is a good side and a bad side to this.

Okay. Try on a dress similar to one Jessica Alba had on. Normally, you wouldn't pick anything like this out, but you never know.

Not Okay. Buy a sonogram machine off of eBay because if Tom can watch his baby kicking around in utero, then you can too.

Okay. Buy some violet eye shadow in a shade Beyonce wore. It looked really pretty and you like her style.

Not Okay. Use your rent money to buy the same Mahnolos SJP had on at the Oscars.

Okay. Read the top stories on E! Online just to see the latest exploits in Hollywood.

Not Okay. Watch Access Hollywood, E! News and Entertainment Tonight daily and yell at the television when they get a story wrong. After all, you read what really happened in the Star last week. (I guess that means I'm not okay!)

Why are we concerned where someone eats lunch, if they eat lunch, and how much lunch they ate?

Fascination. We want in on everyone else's live but our own. We gossip because it's not happening to us. We are not them and they are not us. If you could trade places, would you?
Do you think they would trade places with us?

When you go on that first date with someone who seems like a nice person and you have the butterflies and you rehearse saying hi with your best smile, and you think about the pleasantries that are about to unfold. Wine, a good meal, great service, candlelight...no...those are flashbulbs!
Then the next day you see your mug on a magazine with eyes that are half closed, you look stoned, you have broccoli in your teeth and the caption says "Date from HELL!"

Another exploration in this dual world is motherhood. I don't think I have ever heard a celebrity say "this is harder then I thought" after giving birth.
It's always,
"She's so beautiful."
"He's such a good baby."
"I feel so alive."
"I love to feed him."

Yeah. I bet you do. Then your baby nurse comes in takes over while you do pilates with your personal trainer.

Meanwhile, back in the real world, we are like
"When is he going to get cute."
"She does nothing but eat, sleep and poop."
"Someone get this child to STOP CRYING!!"
"My child hates me!"
"I'm dead tired and I feel like a cow!"

The toughness of life does not discriminate.

There are so few of them and so many of us! Does someone or something or some movie have to dictate how we conduct our lives, raise our children, or choose a church?

We need to think about and ask ourselves why we do certain things. Big or small. If the answer has an agent, then we all have a problem.